Healthy mental, emotional, and behavioral development is important for young people to lead meaningful, productive, and engaged lives. There are many strategies that can promote and strengthen healthy mental, emotional, and behavioral development. One powerful strategy is to grow social and emotional skills.1
Individuals can learn social and emotional skills at any age. Children can learn social and emotional skills from their parents and caregivers. Parents and those in a parenting role can grow social and emotional skills through intentional practice and reflection. ParentingMontana.org, an online resource for parents and those in a parenting role, includes numerous “tools” addressing common parenting issues (e.g., establishing routines, getting homework done, building confidence) that use a five-step process designed to grow the social and emotional skills of parents and children.
The purpose of this survey was to continue the development of a tool to assess the social and emotional skills of parents. Social and emotional skills include understanding and managing oneself, relating to others, and making responsible choices based on self and others. This survey explored the use of questions specifically designed to assess social and emotional skills in the context of parenting. The skills were grouped into five competencies following a framework developed by the Collaborative for Academic, Social, and Emotional Learning (CASEL, www.casel.org):
- Parenting Self-Awareness
- Parenting Self-Management
- Parenting Social Awareness
- Parenting Relationship/Social Skills
- Parenting Responsible Decision Making
The survey asked parents a series of questions to assess their parenting social and emotional skills. It also used a standardized instrument to assess their overall emotional intelligence2 and included questions about child flourishing (for children ages 6 to 17 years),3 school engagement,4and family resilience.5
The survey also asked respondents how much they agreed or disagreed with four beliefs about parenting:
- “Older adults have knowledge and wisdom gained through experience that can benefit me as a parent.”
- “People with children older than mine can have ideas about parenting that are valuable.”
- “I am always learning how to be the parent I want to be.”
- "I can learn new ways of parenting regardless of my age."
[1] National Academies of Sciences, Engineering, and Medicine. (2019). Fostering Healthy Mental, Emotional, and Behavioral Development in Children and Youth: A National Agenda. Washington, DC: The National Academies Press. https://dio.org/10.17226/25201
[2] The Wong and Law Emotional Intelligence Scale (WLEIS). See Law, K. S., Wong, C.-S., & Song, L. J. (2004). The construct and criterion validity of emotional intelligence and its potential utility for management studies. The Journal of Applied Psychology, 89(3), 483–496.
[3] See the National Survey of Children’s Health (2018) at https://www.childhealthdata.org/learn-about-the-nsch/NSCH.
[4] School engagement was assessed asking respondents how much they agreed with two statements: “My child cares about doing well in school” and “My child does all their required homework.”
[5] Bethell, C. D., Gombojav, N., & Whitaker, R. C. (2019). Family Resilience and Connection Promote Flourishing Among US Children, Even Amid Adversity. Health Affairs (Project Hope), 38(5), 729–737.
The Center for Health and Safety Culture pilot tested a version of the survey using an internet convenience sample before administering the final version. The final version used a sample of adults living in Montana recruited online by Qualtrics between September 29 and October 30, 2020. The final sample included 326 respondents: 56.4% were female; ages ranged from 18 to 80 years (mean 42.3 years, standard deviation 14.2 years), 3.7% were Spanish, Hispanic or Latino; 92% were white; 4.9% were American Indian or Alaska Native; and most had a high school degree or more education (26.1% high school only; 21.8% some college; 13.2% Associate’s degree; 19.3% Bachelor’s degree; and 15.6% post-graduate degree).
Most of the respondents had one or more children (82.2%): 27.0% had a child birth to age 5; 32.2% had a child age 6 to 11; 21.2% had a child age 12 to 18; 5.5% had a child age 19 to 20; and 34.4% had a child age 21 or older.
Several items were used to assess each of the five parenting social and emotional competencies. These items showed strong internal reliability (as assessed by Cronbach’s alpha which ranged from .83 to .87). The overall parenting social and emotional skills scale correlated with the standardized emotional intelligence scale (r= .53, p< .001) and with the family resilience scale (r= .62, p< .001).
Because the respondents were recruited online and not randomly selected, these results cannot be generalized to all parents or adults in Montana. Nonetheless, the results do provide important insights about the beliefs of parents and the relationship between their parenting social and emotional skills and important indicators such as family resilience, child flourishing, and child engagement in school.
Table 1 shows the distribution of five social and emotional competencies of respondents who indicated they had children (n= 267).
Figure 1. Parenting Social and Emotional Competencies
Observations
- Many respondents revealed strength in self-awareness, social awareness, and relationship/social skills.
- However, many indicated lower levels of competency in self-management.
- Overall, many respondents have room to improve their parenting social and emotional skills.
- Parenting social and emotional competencies were correlated with family resilience (r= .62, p< .001). As parenting social and emotional competencies increased, family resilience increased.
- Parents with high social and emotional competencies reported high levels of family resilience six times more often than parents reporting low social and emotional competencies.
- Parenting social and emotional competencies were somewhat correlated with child flourishing (r= .34, p< .001) and school engagement (r= .33, p< .001). As parenting social and emotional competencies increased, indicators of flourishing and school engagement among their children increased (as reported by the parent).
Self-awareness skills include the abilities to accurately recognize one’s own emotions, thoughts, and values and how they influence behavior; the ability to accurately assess one’s strengths and limitations with a well-grounded sense of confidence and optimism; and having a growth mindset.
Figure 2. Parenting Self-Awareness Skills
Observations
- Many respondents revealed a growth mindset recognizing that they can improve their parenting skills.
- However, fewer indicated they knew where they needed to improve.
- Overall, many respondents have room to improve their parenting self-awareness skills.
- Parenting self-awareness skills were correlated with family resilience (r= .52, p< .001). As parenting self-awareness skills increased, family resilience increased.
- Parenting self-awareness skills were somewhat correlated with child flourishing (r= .27, p< .001) and school engagement (r= .30, p< .001). As parenting self-awareness skills increased, indicators of flourishing and school engagement among their children increased (as reported by the parent).
Self-management skills include the abilities to successfully regulate one’s emotions, thoughts, and behaviors in different situations — effectively managing stress, controlling impulses, and motivating oneself – and the ability to set and work toward personal goals.
Figure 3. Parenting Self-Management Skills
Observations
- Many respondents indicated they had specific goals for their parenting.
- However, half of the respondents indicated opportunities to improve on managing their emotions when parenting.
- On average, parenting self-management skills were the lowest of the five competencies.
- Parenting self-management skills were correlated with family resilience (r= .51, p< .001). As parenting self-management skills increased, family resilience increased.
- Parenting self-management skills were somewhat correlated with child flourishing (r= .29, p< .001) and school engagement (r= .24, p< .001). As parenting self-management skills increased, indicators of flourishing and school engagement among their children increased (as reported by the parent).
Social awareness skills include the abilities to take the perspective of and empathize with others (including those from diverse backgrounds and cultures), the ability to understand social and ethical norms for behavior, and to recognize family, school, and community resources and supports.
Figure 4. Parenting Social Awareness Skills
Observations
- Many respondents indicated they were sensitive to the feelings of their children.
- However, many respondents indicated it was not always easy to see things from their child’s perspectives.
- Overall, many respondents have room to improve their parenting social awareness skills.
- Parenting social awareness skills were correlated with family resilience (r= .54, p< .001). As parenting social awareness skills increased, family resilience increased.
- Parenting social awareness skills were somewhat correlated with child flourishing (r= .32, p< .001) and school engagement (r= .31, p< .001). As parenting social awareness skills increased, indicators of flourishing and school engagement among their children increased (as reported by the parent).
Parenting relationship/social skills include the abilities to establish and maintain healthy and rewarding relationships with one’s children and the abilities to communicate clearly, listen well, cooperate with others, resist inappropriate social pressure, negotiate conflict constructively, and seek and offer help when needed.
Figure 5. Parenting Relationship/Social Skills
Observations
- Many respondents indicated they apologize to their children when they make a mistake.
- However, many respondents indicated they were not always able to handle conflict with their children without either themselves or their children becoming angry or upset.
- Overall, many respondents have room to improve their parenting relationship/social skills.
- Parenting relationship/social skills were correlated with family resilience (r= .59, p< .001). As parenting relationship/social skills increased, family resilience increased.
- Parenting relationship/social skills were somewhat correlated with child flourishing (r= .35, p< .001) and school engagement (r= .30, p< .001). As parenting relationship/social skills increased, indicators of flourishing and school engagement among their children increased (as reported by the parent).
Parenting responsible decision-making skills include the abilities to make constructive choices about personal behavior and social interactions based on ethical standards, safety concerns, and social norms and the ability to realistically evaluate the consequences of various actions and consider the well-being of oneself and one’s children.
Figure 6. Parenting Responsible Decision-Making Skills
Observations
- Many respondents indicated they reflect on the impact of the parenting in order to improve.
- However, many respondents indicated they do not always discuss the outcomes and impacts of their child’s decisions.
- Overall, many respondents have room to improve their parenting decision-making skills.
- Parenting decision-making skills were correlated with family resilience (r= .53, p< .001). As parenting decision-making skills increased, family resilience increased.
- Parenting decision-making skills were somewhat correlated with child flourishing (r= .31, p< .001) and school engagement (r= .32, p< .001). As parenting decision-making skills increased, indicators of flourishing and school engagement among their children increased (as reported by the parent).
Respondents were asked how much they agreed with four statements about parenting. The results shown in Table 1 include respondents who indicated they had a child (of any age including over the age of 18).
Table 1. Level of Agreement With Four Statements About Parenting
|
How much do you agree or disagree with the following statements? |
Disagree |
Neither Agree Nor Disagree |
Agree |
|
“Older adults have knowledge and wisdom gained through experience that can benefit me as a parent.” |
8% |
7% |
84% |
|
“People with children older than mine can have ideas about parenting that are valuable.” |
7% |
12% |
81% |
|
“I am always learning how to be the parent I want to be.” |
5% |
9% |
85% |
|
“I can learn new ways of parenting regardless of my age.” |
6% |
3% |
91% |
Observations
- Most respondents agreed that older adults and parents with older children may have valuable knowledge about parenting. Older adults may have developed stronger social and emotional competencies and may be able to help younger parents develop similar skills.
- Most respondents also indicated a growth mindset about parenting as they indicated an openness to learning about parenting. This openness indicates a potential willingness to develop their own social and emotional skills.
A survey was developed and implemented to assess the social and emotional competencies of parents. Each of the five measures used to assess the five parenting social and emotional competencies showed strong internal reliability (as assessed by Cronbach’s alpha which ranged from .83 to .87). The overall parenting social and emotional skills scale correlated with a standardized emotional intelligence scale (r= .53, p< .001). Some important results include:
- Many respondents revealed strength in self-awareness, social awareness, and relationship/social skills. However, many indicated lower levels of competency in self-management.
- Parenting social and emotional competencies were correlated with family resilience (r= .62, p< .001). As parenting social and emotional competencies increased, family resilience increased. Parents with high social and emotional competencies reported high levels of family resilience six times more often than parents reporting low social and emotional competencies.
- Most respondents agreed that older adults and parents with older children may have valuable knowledge about parenting and may be able to help younger parents develop their social and emotional competencies.
- Most respondents also indicated a growth mindset about parenting which may include a willingness to develop their own social and emotional skills.
Efforts to grow the social and emotional competencies of parents may increase family resilience and support the healthy development of children. ParentingMontana.org includes tools and resources to grow the social and emotional competencies of parents. While these tools and resources address all five competencies, it may be beneficial to bolster efforts to improve self-management as this was the weakest competency among this sample of parents.
Because the respondents were recruited online and not randomly selected, these results cannot be generalized to all parents or adults in Montana. Nonetheless, the results do provide important insights about the beliefs of parents and the relationship between their parenting social and emotional skills and important indicators such as family resilience, child flourishing, and child engagement in school.
Engaging in constructive dialogue about these results has the potential to improve outcomes in your community by revealing new understanding and opportunities.
Otto Scharmer, in his research on organizational and community change, has recognized the importance of preparing ourselves to learn from new information. He calls this “Quieting the Voices.” He has noted three voices that can inhibit us from learning and engaging in constructive dialogue: the voice of judgement, the voice of cynicism, and the voice of fear. We encourage you to intentionally reflect on how you respond to the results shared in this report and how these voices may be getting in the way of you seeing and learning new information.
We encourage you to acknowledge these voices and try to “quiet” them as you engage in dialogue about these results.
4. Scharmer, C. O. (2009). Theory U: Leading from the Future as It Emerges (1st edition). San Francisco, Calif: Berrett-Koehler Publishers.
Questions to Reveal Deeper Insights
- What surprised you?
- What challenged you?
- What encouraged you?
- What has had real meaning for you from what you have seen in the data?
- What has been your major learning, insight, or discovery so far from these data?
Questions to Focus Collective Attention
- How do these results challenge our current approaches?
- What opportunities can you see that the data are revealing?
Questions to Create Forward Movement
- What is possible here?
- What will it take to create change?
- What needs our immediate attention going forward?
- What do we still need to learn about this issue?
5. Adapted from Brown, J., Isaacs, D., Community, W. C., Senge, P., & Wheatley, M. J. (2005). The World Café: Shaping Our Futures Through Conversations That Matter (1 edition). San Francisco, CA: Berrett-Koehler Publishers.
Download the 2020 Montana Parent Survey Key Findings Report.
Recommended Citation: Center for Health and Safety Culture. (2021). The 2020 Montana Parent Survey Key Findings Report, Bozeman, MT: Montana State University.
This product was supported [in part] by CFDA 93.959 from the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA). The content of this publication does not necessarily reflect the views or policies of SAMHSA or Health and Human Services.
